renitaf@hotmail.com

Renita's Story

I remember finding out that I was pregnant around Valentine's Day of 2001.  I couldn't believe it because I had just gotten off of birth control in December, so to find out that I was pregnant 1 month later was a shocker for me and my husband. But we were happier than words can say because this would be our first child and at 27 I felt I was ready. Everything was going fine when I went for my first visit, but how would my doctor have known?  All I had done was blood work. I wasn't getting sick, I only tired really easy, but no morning sickness. Then right around the time I was about 10 weeks (March 12th, 2001) I went to bed with some cramping-nothing unbearable or painful, just annoying. Then March 13th came around and I woke up around 6:30 A.M. to use the bathroom. When I started to tinkle, I began throwing up in the trash can. No big deal in my eyes, I thought this was the beginning of my morning sickness. After throwing up, I began to sweat profusely, but I was freezing.

I live in South Florida where it's always hot, so being as cold as I was wasn't a good thing. I took my temperature, but it was 97 degrees, no fever. I made hot tea to drink thinking that I was having gas pains. The obstetrician on call at my doctors office said I was simply dehydrated and that after 2 Tylenols and a whole glass of water, I would feel better. I laid in the bed for about 30 minutes then woke up to use the bathroom again. This time right as I was getting ready to sit on the bowl, I passed out and didn't even know my husband was there to catch me. I woke up about a minute later, sort of laying on top of my husband and I heard him yelling for a friend of ours to come and help him with me. When I opened my eyes everything was in black and white to me and nothing looked right. I only knew that my shirt was soaking wet and my husband said that
when I passed out, I had thrown up all over him and myself. I was incoherent at this point and wanting to sleep, but my husband would not let me sleep for fear of me going into a coma. My dad was at the front door before I knew it, and I was off to the emergency room (which was 2 minutes away, thank God.)

I had very little idea what was going on. I got taken out of my dad's car, into a wheel chair, then onto a hospital bed. I arrived at 8:30 A.M. on March 13th. I had an ultrasound at around 11:00 A.M. where they said I WASN'T having an ectopic and that the baby was in the uterus. That mistake nearly cost me my life. I had tests after tests, and pretty much got ignored in an emergency room where my obstetrician never once came to see me while I was suffering. I was in indescribable pain and the pain was all over my body but in my abdomen the most. I couldn't move because if I tried I would hyperventilate from the pain. I was sweating fiercely, but I was freezing and even four blankets couldn't get me warm. I was so thirsty, and hooked up to heart monitors and numerous IV's. Long story short, I got left in the emergency room to suffer from 8:30 A.M. to 2:45 A.M. (the next day) before a couple of great nurses came along and got on the ball. They called the GYM that was on duty and he ordered another ultrasound for me. After putting the catheter in me for the 2nd time, they knew how it intensified my pain by a million, they were rolling me towards the ultrasound room. I will never forget the words of the ultrasound guy "Are you pregnant? Are you sure you are pregnant?"

I told him yes a dozen times. He said to me "Please prepare yourself for anything that is about to happen to you and I wish you the best." Next thing you know I was signing a few consent forms. I was signing one for blood and for this or that. Then I was told what was happening to me. It was now 3:00 A.M. and I was being told that I was having
an ectopic pregnancy and that I needed an emergency surgery. My blood pressure had fallen, and my pulse was fading. The IV's were not staying in my arm because my veins were sinking into my body. Before you know it I was on an operating table. And at this point in my mind I had said goodbye to the child I had wanted all my life. When I woke up I was told that I lost my right tube. I had to have a very large blood transfusion as my tube had ruptured which is why I had such excruciating pain. I lost over half the blood in my body, a tube, and there was a liter of blood just in my stomach when I was cut open. I now have about an 8-inch scar under my belly button, which is a bikini cut, but its still a long cut. I had 20 staples after surgery and I had an IV in my jugular vein because since I had lost so much blood all my other veins were too small for the transfusion.

I stayed in the hospital for 5 more days. In that time, I think my husband was suffering
more than I. The whole time I was there I didn't cry. I was in too much pain.  Then when the last day came for me to be in the hospital, I woke up at 7:30 A.M. and cried until 11:30 A.M.. It was an uncontrollable cry and it was then that perhaps I suffered so much. In my heart I felt it was a girl, but I will never know. I miss my baby so much and every day she's a thought of mine. I still have my left tube and both ovaries, so there is hope for us and I have lots of faith that maybe luck will be on my side next time. It's now been 8 weeks since I lost my baby and I am recovering well, at least physically. I couldn't walk straight for about a week, but then I was feeling better, and after 3 1/2 weeks I went back to work. Everyday I miss my baby sooooooo much, but I know my little baby angel is watching out for her mom and dad. If she/he watches over us, then some day soon, we will bring her a beautiful baby. Until then, we stay healthy and positive until we can try again. Thank you.

UPDATE:

I am pregnant again, already. I am so nervous and losing lots of sleep. I need support from the people who have suffered an ectopic and been successful the 2nd time around. I am only 4 weeks, I am sure of it because I know the date I got pregnant. I have gone to the doctor, and she says she is going to monitor my levels for a little while until she thinks she can give me an ultrasound. So I went to have a beta HCG test done but they wont be able to tell anything until they have more than one reading and something to compare it with. So today I went to give blood, and I asked what my levels were the first time I gave blood and it is now at 2444. So by tomorrow I will know what the reading is, as it should be around 5000. But I am so nervous and very scared. I am very pessimistic right now even though I know I should not be. I keep feeling like it is going to happen again. What a great attitude huh? I AM SO SCARED!! Sometimes I will have a strange dull pain near my ovaries, and in my mind I say oh it is gonna happen again. But I am gonna try to feel more positive.