cckitti9596@hotmail.com
Crissy's Story Continued

I just found your web page tonight.  I had a miscarriage on January 2, 2001.  I became pregnant again for the second time on February 26, 2001 (about 10 weeks later).  My HCG levels were rising and I had none of the symptoms of ectopic, so I continued to be monitored with the HCG levels and vaginal ultrasounds.  When my levels reached almost 10,000, the doctor took me in his office and told me something was terribly wrong.  This time I was by myself, for I had asked my husband not to go with me as I could not thing on a level of being pregnant, the first miscarriage was our first pregnancy after being married for over 5 years.  I was due to have a laporoscopy on Tuesday.  I left the doctor's office numb and could talk about it.  This was a Friday, and Sunday I started to have some cramps and could not see out of my left eye.  I got really nervous and we called and they told us to go to the ER.

I was admitted to the hospital and 24 hours later, I made the decision to have the methotrexate drug.  I was a prime candidate with no internal bleeding and virtually none of the classic ectopic symptoms.  I returned home after 4 days and my husband had to go on a business trip.  I was told that I could not be alone for at least 5 days, as I could still rupture.  My Mom, Gram, and brothers stayed with me until my husband came home.  He cut the trip as short as he could.  He has not left my side since January and is so great, but my grief is beyond anything that I can fully explain.

 I am going to a counselor this week to talk and my doctor put me on Zoloft for 6 months.  As I type I am scared that there is something wrong, because I have been bleeding.  I am going to the doctor tomorrow to be poked and picked again. Right now I just want it to end.  I don't want to talk about it anymore, but I know I have to.  I have such a  wonderful family of support and my husband cannot understand why I can't just talk to him.  I can, but I can't.  I am 30 years old and always thought by now I would have at least three children.  At the present time I am nervous about the bleeding.  Hopefully all is okay.  Thanks for letting me "vent", and thanks for this web site.  I will be visiting quite often.  Take care.