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Hello, everyone! Can you believe that I am at 21 weeks now, and am just writing to you all? Thank you all so much for taking an interest in Cooper's entrance into this world-it means so much to Todd and I!

Many of you know how hard it has been for me to relax about being pg. again. I had another OB appointment on Monday, and he is still doing really well. I do have more confidence now, and I hope it only continues to grow! His heart rate was 146, which is about average (normal is 120-166). My cervix still looks normal, and Dr. Browne said that he sees no reason that I would deliver early, i.e., that the conalization that I had in 1998 seems to have posed no IC (incompetent cervix) risk. I will go for u/s two more times in the next month, and then I can fall back to regularly scheduled prenatal appointments. To be honest, I think that I will still worry about it, no matter what he says!

I now weigh 148 (sheesh)-up from 117 to start with! I was told not to worry, as long as my legs, arms, face, etc. don't show signs of extreme bloating. I do need to start exercising regularly, which I am sad to admit that I haven't been...

I am going to put the new u/s pictures on the site this weekend. If you have seen the others, you will notice how much he has changed in two weeks! I had to ask Dr. Browne if his nose looked really big, or was it just me? LOL He said that they all look like puppies at this point, and I had to laugh. If you have seen a puppy recently, you know what he meant!

Currently hoping to get the nursery up and looking real. I ordered the crib yesterday, and my Mom came over today to purchase the changing table. I think that having a real "nursery", and not just a closet full of baby things, will help to ease my fears and realize that he REALLY will be here soon. I am currently working on a family website, and will be moving Cooper's u/s pictures and (hopefully soon) adding some nursery pictures.

Thanks again to you all. I know that many of you are hoping for a little miracle of your own soon, and I pray for you on a daily basis.

About to start our 31st week, and I must admit that I am getting quite anxious! I am counting days on the calendar with new fervor-whereas before I only checked a day off after 12:00 A.M. , or the next morning, I now just check it off before bed! I also find myself estimating his earliest and latest arrival date, the latter of which makes me nauseous!

My glucose test came back in good standing, and it really wasn't all that bad. I find out last week that the test can be done by eating 28 jelly beans (instead of drinking the pseudo-Fanta Orange). Oh, well. Too late for any protests now! I go back to Dr. Browne (Maternal-Fetal Obstetrician) on Monday, and we will have the big labor/delivery discussion. Of course, I already have a two-page birth plan. LOL We know that neither labor or delivery goes according to anyone's plan, except for that of the impending arrival! I added the 28 week tummy picture to the site, and it really doesn't look any different (to me) than the 24 week picture. Actually, I look smaller. Todd swears that he has dropped down into my pelvis, but my trouble breathing says differently. I have been having HORRID acid reflux and am anticipating that Dr. Browne will prescribe something for it. Yes, it is that bad! I haven't been sleeping because of it, and sleep is so important, especially now! Everyone says that he will have lots of hair-old wives's tale regarding reflux, but all the other old wives's tales say that Cooper is a girl. Not too much faith in old wives's tales will probably be as bald as his bottom! I have been gaining about 1 1/2 pounds every two weeks, which is leveling off from the 5 pounds at one time. Thank goodness, as the uncomfortableness of the last few months is setting in BIG TIME! I keep reminding myself that all these physical symptoms are just temporary, and that they are all worth it in the end. I could do without the acid reflux, but such is life (or the creation of it for me).

We had a slight scare several weeks ago. It was a Sunday, and I had some cramping. The cramping lasted about 45 minutes, and then back pain/pressure like I have never experienced began! I took two Tylenol, and when those didn't work, I was sure that I was in labor! Two hours into this, I started having trouble using the bathroom. That really got me scared, so I finally caved in and called the MFOB on call. I should have called earlier, I know, I know. He had us come to the hospital, where I was hooked up to the fetal monitor for about two hours. Everything seemed fine-no worrisome contractions, fetal heart rate good. My first urine test came back with a small amount of blood, so they ordered a full culture. The nurse offered me the choice of a "clean catch" sample or a catheter. Hello? I took the "clean catch" option. Obviously. The full culture came back okay, so I possibly had a slight bladder irritation. Although everything turned out okay, Todd and I were quite scared and it all brought forth the realization that we were very unprepared for Cooper to arrive then! The nursery is still not painted, and the new room (former screened-in porch), which will be the office still needs sheet rock! Needless to say, we have been busy beavers getting things done around here...

For those of you who have been asking, I am still planning on putting some nursery pictures up on the site. I promise-they are on the way! I am really just waiting on the bedding to arrive, so that we can paint the changing dresser. Money is getting tight. Well, not getting-it has always been tight, but when you realize that you NEED/WANT/WHATEVER certain things-it gets even tighter. I don't think that Cooper will really care what his nursery looks like, but it is hard for a first-time (here on Earth) Mommy not to dream!

We "think" that Cooper's middle name will be Truman. I like it so much, I may have a hard time not calling him that! It is still up in the air, and the little soul might not even have a middle name for weeks after he is born! I am really pushing for Truman, as all Todd can think of is "Todd".

I will close this update novel with this: Kloey, our 16-week Great Dane, is learning all about baby. I have swaddled one of my old baby dolls and wiped it's face with Cooper's baby wipes. She is allowed to smell it, but not touch. She is really interested in it, and I hope my plan works to help her transition when Cooper gets here. She will be an outside dog, with our 2-year old deaf Dane (Darby), but will probably still be too small when Cooper is born. I will let you all know how this little experiment works!

Take care.

First, I would like to apologize to all of you who have written me personally over the last few weeks- I have developed a vicious case of edema (swelling) in my ankles and feet! Sitting at the computer (or anywhere for that matter) makes it worse, but I am slowly and surely getting through my e-mails. Thank you so much for taking your time to write, and know that I am doing my best to get back to you, as all the wonderful thoughts mean so much to me!

In the 35th week now, and rounding the corner to Cooper's arrival. The nursery has been painted, the bedding and glider have arrived, and Todd is in the midst of painting the changing dresser. It is really strange to look into the nursery...where there was once a closet full of "hopefuls", there is now a REAL room being prepared for a REAL person (and not just a dream). I have a couple of little "extras" to purchase, and I can't wait to see the final result! I promise to have pictures on his page very soon.

As of today, I weigh 163 1/2 lbs. and am measuring at 36. Blood pressure is still good. Cooper's estimated weight is 6 lbs. He did the "wave" during the entire ultrasound. Aren't they supposed to run out of room at some point? I swear, this child will sleep for weeks after all the activity in the womb! We started our childbirth classes last week. Yes, a little late, since everyone else there is due in August and September. Not sure how much we will really get from the classes, but we didn't want to miss the experience.

His middle name is now officially "Truman", and I am afraid that I will have trouble not using that as his called name! I just love it. Truman Capote, Harry Truman, any others that you guys know of? The Truman Show doesn't count! I have some new ultrasound pictures, and a tummy picture, but still have to set up the scanner since the computer's move to the Guest Bedroom. Our add-on room (formerly screened porch) is still not completed, but we have put that on the back burner for now. The Guest Bedroom is jam-packed, but usable.

Kloey spent her first weekend outside with Darby starting Friday. Kloey is having a ball, but I can't say the same for myself. Not having her with me all day long...I bawled for hours on Friday night. Todd almost went to get her for a bath, so that she could sleep with us! Ah, well. They do grow up. LOL Todd says that I will be a wreck when Cooper goes to school for the first time.

Well, that is it for now. Thanks always for your care, concern, and loving wishes!

Hello, everyone! Sorry to be so far in-between updates. I hope that all is well with each and every one of you! I haven't been online as much as I used to be, and am desperately trying to get things with my site and support list squared away before Cooper arrives!

First, the nursery is done! I am waiting on a rug to arrive, and will take post pictures as soon as it does! You will be able to find them through www.ectopicpregnancy.com/littlebean.htm I am so excited. Seeing the nursery looking like a "nursery" makes it finally seem real. That, and the cramps and contractions that I have been having! LOL

When I went to the OB last Monday, I had already begun effacing. I knew "something" was up, I had been having cramps on and off for about 5 days before that. Contractions had been in the lower back, but not on any sort of regular basis. Cooper's estimated weight was 7 lbs. 10 oz. via ultrasound, but that can be off as much as 10%. I forgot to ask if that was either way! There is new ultrasound picture on the site, showing his pouty little lips-too cute! The picture can also be found through littlebean.htm.

Between last week and this week's appointments, the cramping remained about the same, so I didn't have an internal today. I did have an ultrasound, but they were unable to estimate his weight-problem with the machine. They will have it fixed by next Monday's appointment. I was assured that he is still a boy (giggle, giggle) and that he looks great! The appointment was in the late afternoon, which is his resting period. The tech wanted to see more movement, so he got "buzzed". She used a little handheld sound machine and by placing it next to my abdomen and turning it on, a loud buzz woke him up! He was not happy, but the tech was assured that he was moving like he should. Bless his heart. However, he calmed down pretty quickly-must be because Mommy is a screamer. Will have to cut that little habit out really quick, eh?

I now weigh 166 lbs. (from an original 117 lbs.). Blood pressure is great (120/74), but my keytones were a little low. Which means that I am a tad bit dehydrated. I was told to not be too concerned, but to up my fluid intake. I am still experiencing pretty nasty edema in my feet and ankles, but it has started to go away when I make a conscious effort to put my feet up. I have loved being pregnant, but some of the little aches and pains are no fun! :)

Who knows when Cooper will arrive? Not too anxious yet-have lots to do around the house still. Todd will send an e-mail should anything exciting happen in the next week. If not, I will talk to you all next Monday.

Thank you so much for taking an interest in our lives further than our story on the site. Your continued words of comfort and support continue to make my day!

Take care.

Moving into the 40th week now, but there isn't too much exciting news to report! My exam yesterday showed that absolutely nothing has changed since two weeks ago! Sheesh. I was expecting him to say, "Meet me at the hospital tomorrow." Yeah, right.

Cooper is as far down as he can possibly go, and weighs about 8 lbs. 6 oz. He was being shy with the face, but he IS in tight quarters at this point! Blood pressure was great, and I have gained 1/2 lb. since last Monday. I had some spotting yesterday afternoon, which was to be expected after the torturous internal exam. However, I also had some this morning, and then just an hour ago-bloody show! Exciting, until you realize that this can happen weeks before delivery. So, I am just waiting now.

My doctor is on vacation next week, and this is giving me fits. I have met one of the other doctors in the practice, and have talked to the other on the phone, but I don't know how I feel about someone other than Dr. Browne delivering. I guess at that point it doesn't matter. I told a friend yesterday that if someone walked in off the street during hard labor, and said "Gee. I have always wanted to learn how to deliver a baby", I would probably let them just to move things along! LOL

The nursery rug finally came, and it is in the dryer (as we speak). I can't wait for Todd to get home so that we can put it down. The nursery will be complete! Better late than never, eh? By the time this update is sent, there should be nursery pictures on the site!

So, for those of you who had been thinking that my absence was due to the arrival of Cooper, nope. The million and one projects that I have been doing are the reason. I truly wish otherwise...soon that will be the case. Say a prayer for us when you can!

All apologies to all of you who have been such an important part of my life over the last year and a half! I have many e-mails to respond to, personally and to the lists that I belong to, and promise to get back to you all in the near future. The events of the last week have been a whirlwind, and my lack of correspondence does not indicate how much you all mean to me-Todd and Cooper, too! Thanks in advance for reading this mini-novella...

Drum roll please...Announcing the birth of Cooper Truman, born on July 11, 2000 at 1:33 P.M. Cooper was 8 lbs. 11 oz. and 19 1/2 inches long! There is a new page on littlebean.htm (Welcome to the World, Little Bean) where you can see our little man! Todd and I are just thrilled and cannot believe that we have been finally blessed with this miracle of life, science, and God. I have been in a state of euphoria from first sight, and as my Mother-in-Law said yesterday-I think I am in love!

At my MFOB appointment on Thursday, July 6, I had barely made any progress (dilation barely 1 cm. and effacement 80%). My membranes were stripped, and I was very hopeful that I would soon be in hard labor. Friday, Saturday, and Sunday came and went and I was so depressed. At my MFOB appointment on Monday (July 10), I was told that I had dilated to 2 cm. and was 90% effaced. However, I wanted to be 4 cm. dilated and 100% effaced-I was ready to the show on the road! Dr. Browne said that if I had not gone into labor by the following Monday (July 17), that he would schedule me for induction the next day (Tuesday, July 18). He could tell that I was very disappointed, frustrated, and still so worried about Cooper ever being born!

I had been religiously timing my contractions since my "bloody show" appointment, but was so disillusioned at this point, I didn't bother keeping count of any that afternoon. There weren't very many anyway, and I was trying to come to grips with waiting another week. Todd and I went to bed about 11:00 P.M. At 2:00 A.M., I felt a sharp cramp and a little gush of fluid. After going to the restroom, and waiting about 10 minutes-the "contractions from hell" made their first appearance. Although we had been told to time contractions for an hour and a half before getting too excited, the next four contractions (about 12 minutes apart) and the pain that they caused seemed good enough reason to call. Dr. Browne said that this might be the real thing and headed off to the hospital...

The hospital is about an hour from our home, and by the time we got there, the contractions were coming every four minutes, and I was in the back seat writhing around and screaming my fool head off! Poor Todd was trying get there fast, but carefully, and hold my hand over the back seat. We were immediately admitted into OB triage, and I was hooked up to the monitor. Each contraction brought the most intense back pain, and I did cuss really loud one time (I must confess, but won't repeat here, as it wasn't very ladylike). At one point, I was sure that Cooper was about to make his appearance right there in triage. The pressure in my back was very intense and I was scared. Dr. Browne came in an said that while I was only at 2 cm., he was going to admit me and get me a little something to "take the edge off". Good idea on his part, as I probably would have strangled him and Todd both just for being within reach had I been told that I had to go home and take a Tylenol! LOL

After being moved to my room, I was given a small dosage of Demerol and Fib-u-something (anti-nausea). The contractions continued to be horribly painful, but the pressure didn't make me feel as if I was going to injure myself with the need to push. Only two hours later, I was dilated to 5 cm. and they called the "Candy Man"-the anesthesiologist. I really respect women who go through childbirth without medications for pain, but "epidural" is my new favorite word. While I felt no contractions after the epidural, I was soon dilated to 10 cm. and ready to push!

I expected some pain from pushing, but there wasn't any! Todd was wonderful, and kept telling me what a good job I was doing and how much he loved me. Bless his heart. After about two hours, Dr. Browne offered me the use of forceps to get my little man out. I hesitated for about two seconds, asked how Cooper would react, and said "let's do it" when I was assured that Cooper would be okay. Three sets of very hard pushes later, and then I heard the most amazing sound-my son gurgling and crying! (audio will soon be on site) When Dr. Browne held him up, I was just thinking, "where did they get that baby?"...

Todd cut the cord, and it was soon established that Cooper was a perfectly healthy baby. I felt both physical and emotional relief like never before. However, my blood pressure took a quick decline and I began to feel very faint. My feet were elevated, and I spent the next two hours upside down on the bed. Thankfully, Todd jumped right in and made Cooper feel safe and secure. Todd's sister, Melanie (Auntie M), was there and she took pictures and videotaped the entire event for us, while keeping Todd company while I was being taken care of!

When my blood pressure stabilized enough to be moved to my permanent room, they loaded me and Cooper (on my lap) into a wheelchair, and off we went! However, I soon began to feel faint again and begged the nurse to take Cooper, as my hearing and vision were already fading. That is the worst feeling, as I knew that I was going to pass out. Just as the nurse scooped Cooper away, I was out. I woke up with an ammonia inhalant in my face, but felt better than I would have expected. After several hours on IV fluids and eating my first meal in 12 hours, I was feeling much better. I am now severely anemic, but am taking iron to help me get back to normal. My blood pressure is still kind of low, but I know that I will be okay. I was told that 5 years ago, I would have been given a transfusion for the anemia, and I am so thankful that was not necessary and that my caregivers took a more conservative approach.

We have been home since Thursday afternoon, and I am feeling much stronger today. Cooper is an absolute delight, and I KNOW that everything that Todd and I went through in the last year and a half was worth it in many ways. We now can give the love that we have always felt (and always will feel), and not keep it stored away...I cannot explain how I feel moment by moment, and I can't even begin to try. I only hope that all of you who have not felt what I feel will one day very soon...

Much love.

Whew! What a 5 weeks it has been! I am tired (so tired), but I could never have imagined that life would ever feel this way-it is bliss!

Cooper is doing wonderfully. He weighs 10 lbs. 12 oz. and is 22 1/4 inches long-that's almost two pounds and two inches since birth. He is a little "chunk"-my little fat man! I am enclosing a new photo, and there will be tons of them on the site very soon. As of now, I have added several new ones, but just haven't had time to rework the page to include more. Promise to get to that as soon as I can. I realized today that I never posted nursery photos on the site. When I rework the photo page, I will upload those, too...

Breastfeeding is going well. It is a full-time job, and can get tiresome at times. However, I wouldn't trade it for the world, and am so thankful that I am able to do it. Sleeping varies-he sleeps anywhere from 4-7 hours at night, but sometimes refuses to take a nap ALL DAY LONG! Todd gets at least one crying "when will you be home?" phone call a week. He is a doting Daddy, and loves to sing silly songs to Cooper. Mommy gets tired of them, but Cooper never does!

Cooper had his Hep-B shot on Monday, and it was awful. I think more so for me than him! His little face screwed up, turned beet red, and took on such a look of distrust. Then the screaming started. I cried. It was just pitiful-I had to hold his leg while they gave him the shot, and I will NOT be doing that again. Next time, they can have someone else come in to hold his leg, and I will comfort him. What a stupid thing to have the parent all the way down at the leg!

Got my first taste of urine week before last. That was endearing, let me tell you. Cooper and I were taking a nap, and when I woke up, I decided to check his diaper. I opened one tab, leaned over to look, and BAM! Money shot in the mouth. It was shocking then, but now I just have to giggle thinking about it...

There is so much more that I could prattle on about, but I will spare you all. Don't want you to regret signing up for the update list! As always, thank you for being there for us...Best of luck to you all. Take care.